Fear to Figure: A healthy beginning?
Me? I have struggled with binge eating disorder on and off for eight years, beginning back in the difficult days of high school. Attempts to starve myself and abusing my body with excessive exercise finally cracked and the restrictions pushed my body to run on survival mode and replenish through the means of re-feeding. They began as being few and far between, an episode usually once a week. After a few months, they only progressed and became uglier. After a few years they became my filthy, dirty secret, but also my prolonged salvation. These episodes controlled my life... where I went, how long I stayed, who I hung out with, what I thought.. literally everything. Absolute consumption. But, this blog journey isn't meant to reminisce about my issues. This is a journey of a new beginning. An experiment for my mind and body. I have tried almost every intervention out there to help ease me back into balance and away from the binges, but nothing has seemed to work. It is time for an extreme change, one that many people might even say is ludicrous or foolish.
I have decided to prep for an NPC figure competition.
Why? Because of all the research out there regarding women who train in these competitions, the most prominent and common theme is the development of binge eating habits post-competition. This is due to the unhealthy, drastic measures many individuals take to restrict food, cut fat, and starve their cells of fuel and nutrition.
I have never supported this approach, and coming from a background of balanced nutrition and being an athlete, I strongly believe there is another way to prep for a stage body without starving it.
So now it's my turn. Every blog I've read documents someones personal experience of coping with negative outcomes after competing, but never have I seen the opposite. Coming from a place of struggle and lack of control, I am beginning a new healthy living experiment to compete, and maybe even win, my first ever figure competition through fueling my body, listening to my body, intuitively eating, and limiting my training to a place of balance.
Can I do it? Will my binge eating cease to exist or become less dominating in a controlled environment where I change all my regular habits to work toward a bigger goal?
I have no idea. But at this time I am willing to try anything.
And so I begin.
I have decided to prep for an NPC figure competition.
Why? Because of all the research out there regarding women who train in these competitions, the most prominent and common theme is the development of binge eating habits post-competition. This is due to the unhealthy, drastic measures many individuals take to restrict food, cut fat, and starve their cells of fuel and nutrition.
I have never supported this approach, and coming from a background of balanced nutrition and being an athlete, I strongly believe there is another way to prep for a stage body without starving it.
So now it's my turn. Every blog I've read documents someones personal experience of coping with negative outcomes after competing, but never have I seen the opposite. Coming from a place of struggle and lack of control, I am beginning a new healthy living experiment to compete, and maybe even win, my first ever figure competition through fueling my body, listening to my body, intuitively eating, and limiting my training to a place of balance.
Can I do it? Will my binge eating cease to exist or become less dominating in a controlled environment where I change all my regular habits to work toward a bigger goal?
I have no idea. But at this time I am willing to try anything.
And so I begin.
Comments
Post a Comment